Jon Snow…back by popular demand. Just like this article (which was only demanded by my editor-in-chief, not popular demand). For those of you who have not watched last night’s episode of Game of Thrones you may want to back out now. You’ve been warned.
This season is going to be so epic. I mean seriously, mind-blowing, what the actual fuck just happened, epic. We got a glimpse of Bran – and HODOR – and how his warging (is that a word?) has progressed in the off season. We get a little history on Eddard and Benjen Stark as well as meet Lyanna and of course a young Hodor also known as Willis. All while Meera just hangs out in the snow feeling sorry for herself. Yeah your brother died…sorry he was needed for The Maze Runner. BRAN CAN’T USE HIS LEGS AND THINKS EVERYONE HE KNOWS IS DEAD. Get over it, Meera.
Arya is finally becoming no one which I am kind of disappointed in. I am really bored with this storyline currently. I really liked Ja’quen in the first season; he intrigued me. As the seasons have passed he’s gotten on my nerves and Arya has gone from being super badass chick who survived after her father’s beheading by pretending to be a guy to this whiny little bitch who just wants to be no one. I miss badass Arya. I hope she goes back to being badass soon.
And apparently she’s traded places with her sister Sansa because Sansa is killing it this season. Finally teamed up with Brienne and Pod and I’m actually disappointed that Theon is leaving her. A little part of me was kind of rooting for them to kiss and make up and actually kiss and make out.
Oh yeah…Tyrion let the dragons loose. RAWR. Also, best line of the movie: “That’s what I do. I drink and I know things.” My life’s motto.
The second biggest thing to happen this episode was that dirty son of a bitch Ramsey Bolton killing his father and his step mother and hours old baby brother. He has always creeped me out and even makes me a little sick from time to time. The stabbing scene kind of took me by surprise because when it happened I thought that Roose had stabbed Ramsey and not the other way around. This death was so tame compared to Lady Walda and the baby. I know she’s not really portrayed as being overly intelligent but when Ramsey takes her into the hound pen and starts opening doors and she just keeps repeating “Where’s Lord Bolton?” I am screaming at my screen GET THE FUCK OUT OF THAT PEN YOU DUMB BITCH. Geeze, everyone else saw it coming why can’t you?
And now for the big thing everyone has been waiting on. Jon Snow is ALIVE! Hallelujah, praise the old gods and the new. I know everyone, including myself, has been hoping
for this since June 14, 2015 but with all of the statements and interviews from Kit Harrington (actor, Jon Snow) I had tried to accept that he was dead. Kit has since come out and apologized for lying to everyone, however I don’t think he lied. Jon Snow was dead. Full on dead and not coming back. Thanks to Melisandre we have our favorite character back. I was a little worried about that, also, at the end of the season premiere because I felt like it was implied that the Red Woman had taken off her necklace to die. I was definitely not expecting to see her in this episode. Not alive, anyway, and not bringing Jon Snow back from the dead. I was starting to worry about Sansa heading to Castle Black and finding Jon dead. I was also a little suspicious of the fact that no one had sent any ravens about him being dead. I was a little bummed that we still haven’t seen or heard of Samwell. I could have sworn that’s where Edd was going, but was not at all when he came back with the wildlings and they imprisoned all the traitors. The only thing that could have made that better is if instead of imprisoning them they’d just killed them all.
Anyway, don’t relax just quite yet. Just because Jon Snow is alive doesn’t mean he is safe from death. Also, all your other favorite characters could die as well. I mean, we still have Tyrion, Dany, Arya, Sansa, Bran, Hodor…the list goes on and on so don’t get comfortable.